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Have you lost a loved one? Please weigh in…

I’m looking to speak to people who have lost a loved one. This is for educational purposes, I would like to know what it is the largest hurdle you encountered either before, during, or after their death.

Was it personal emotions? Diagnosis and medical issues? Life insurance payout or mortgage discharge? Funeral arrangements? If you could have waved a magic wand and had something go differently aside from losing the person you care about, what would that be? What gave you the most trouble or was the largest obstacle?

If you prefer to discuss privately, comment here and I will message you directly. Please remember to check your other folder if you choose this option.

Thank you for your time 🙂

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29 Responses

  1. Too many to speak of but my mom’s death was the worse

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  2. Lost my dad, sis, grandmother, sons bio dad. Feel free to pm.

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  3. Not having the money to fly home to say goodbye, one last hug and kiss after a game of queens would’ve made the last few months alot more bearable… Rip Big Nan

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  4. Lisa Hoff Lisa Hoff says:

    The fact that everyone else around you carries on, as life continues. But for you life is forever different/changed. There becomes a disconnect between you and others as how can life carry on as normal…when everything around and inside you is different?

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  5. I lost my Mom over 20 years ago. The hardest tunes for me are when I’m sick. I want nothing more than to crawl into bed with her and have her stroke my hair while I fall asleep. He birthday and Christmas are still super tough. And whenever something really good happens to me i still want to phone her and tell her.

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    • Mari Scott Mari Scott says:

      Yes – I always think of my mom and need her when I’m sick. I just want to put my head in her lap and have her stroke my hair. I still want to phone her, just because. It doesn’t get easier, just more time passes.

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    • Mother’s day gets me grumpy! I have actually yelled at the TV – “YEAH, IF I HAD A MOM” I feel sorry for my boyfriend some days!

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  6. Watching you child take his only breath to tiny to even be real…..

    The funeral home. And their kindness.

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  7. Ruth Chalk Ruth Chalk says:

    Hey I would love to talk to you about a couple family members. Pm me for more details.

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  8. I lost my brother 7 years ago. Pm me if you’d like

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  9. Just lost my Dad (he was 48yrs old) to S4 colon cancer on January 19th, ’18.

    He went to have his colonoscopy done on the 13th of December, ’17, and found out his right side of colon was completely covered in tumors. He had lesions all over his liver – and had spread all throughout his lymphnodes.

    I live an hour north of Edmonton. I got the call to come down on the 12th of January. The only flight available without extreme layovers were on Wednesday.
    I flew home to Hamilton, ON on that Wed. to be with my Dad and family.

    Dad was very, very sick when I walked in his room, but he could still commumicate. He told me he loved me very much – and he got to meet his first grandson.

    Come Thursday, he started declining. He was then put into Bob Kemp Hospice. On the afternoon of January 19th, Dad passed away peacefully while I held his hand. I kissed his forehead and told him I loved him, and that he could sleep peacefully without the suffering.

    The first couple of nights were the hardest, because I was just expecting him to just walk through the front door… but I knew he wouldn’t. It gets easier everyday, but I will be missing him forever. He won’t be forgotten.

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  10. Lost my mom when I was 11 years old. Then was forced to move with my bio dad to another city (which I had no relationship with — now a blessing I love him very much) Our step father (only man I called dad) abandoned us. My bio dad had a wife but left us soon after our arrival and I had no female figure in my life to talk about the “women things”
    a young girl needs. Soon I would be introduced to my bio aunts. I became exceptionally close to them, particularly one that I eventually lived with. I lost her now one year ago and the other one 4 months ago. My father is not well now either. Sooooo everyday I am reminded of those I love and how not to take anything for granted <3

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  11. Rowena Eger Rowena Eger says:

    Before my mom passed,she made my younger sister the executor of her will,I was FURIOUS!! Then she passed…..I was INCONSOLABLE!!! I couldn’t eat,drink,sleep,I couldn’t go 2mins without crying. The funeral director sounded like Charlie Browns teacher,actually most people did! I could do nothing! Make no decisions,sign no paperwork,barely even make eye contact,and not because my sister was the executor,but because I was physically,mentally,and emotionally undone! When the most extreme grief had passed I came to realize how completely my mother knew and understood me,and that taking the burden of her passing off my shoulders was the last gift she would ever give me. I miss her everyday,I hope she knows that we are better than okay,and that it is because of her! There is more I could say,you can pm if you would like.

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  12. Lost my step daughter in 2014. One the hardest things I have ever had to do was look at my children and tell them that their sister wasn’t coming home. The scream my daughter let out was the most devastating sound I have ever heard. The nightmares that happens afterwards were just as hard. If you want to talk more send me a message.

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  13. Mari Scott Mari Scott says:

    I’ve lost so many people in my life…too numerous to mention here. I come from a big family, so it’s to be expected. The worst thing to happen in my family is in-fighting. Be careful not to be too harsh and you have to understand that everyone grieves differently and this is the time to come together, not be ripped apart. Everyone is so sensitive and other issues come to the surface. Try to deal with your stuff with a sibling or relative in a polite, mature and loving way.

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  14. Lyn Hessels Lyn Hessels says:

    The emptiness after. Especially for older couples when their partner is gone.

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  15. The biggest hurdle for me is probably trying to think k of the last place they we’re and where they would have gone after that. You try to anticipate their moves and that I find is really hard, also it’s kind of tough to choose when enough is enough and you can’t spend any more time looking for them so you just let the cops handle it

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  16. I just lost a loved one yesterday

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  17. I lost my grandma to cancer and for me the hardest part was not being close to her when I was younger. Her grandchildren were her entire life and we just never were close but now it really bothers me that I didn’t talk to her more or hang out around her more so I could have really good personal memories.

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  18. I’ve lost many loved ones, and have never thought of this subject.

    The hardest part of dealing with the loss of a loved one, for me, is honestly dealing with other people, both dealing with their grief, but moreso trying to help with mine!

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  19. Funeral Home trying to talk us into expensive coffin or urn and giving us a look when we picked cardboard box.

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  20. Sue Dubya Sue Dubya says:

    For me it was the grief; the sense of loss. I lost my mom only 5-1/2 years ago and I still find it difficult. I did grief counselling, saw the doc for help, and the others who commented are right; life carries on around you, but for me a massive part of my life is gone, and I’m empty. I have changed a lot since she passed.
    Please PM me for more insight.

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