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Family Law: Separation and Division of Property Question

Hi there,

So my ex and I have been married for 1 year and 4 months and he has been out of the home for 4 months now after problems in our marriage which I won’t go into. In that time I have been paying 100% of the mortgage and household bills. He has been out of a job for over a year and has just recently been offered his third temp job which starts next week. The other temp jobs “feel through”.

Today he phoned me and said that he will be moving back in tomorrow because our home is easier for him to get to from here by bus / LRT than his parents place and says that he will contribute to the mortgage in about a month after he starts earning some money. So basically I have to have him here in a small condo for a month while he’s not contributing??? There has to be some legality that he just can’t move back in here when he pleases and pay nothing until he can. I should also add this is the 3rd temp job he’s had in less than a month so there isn’t even a guarantee that this will last.

On top of paying for all the bills and the mortgage I just can’t afford thousands of dollars for a lawyer right now and make too much for legal aid……and this just doesn’t seem right. Can he move back in, contribute nothing, even though his name is on the mortgage?

Thanks for your input.

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65 Responses

  1. If the two of you bought the property together he is entitled to half of the home anyway. It’s better to have him pay than to not pay. Try student legal services and see if you qualify for free services from them Or eclc.ca

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  2. Simple. Change the locks and do not provide him a key.
    The law is on his side but it’s his job to enforce it and as many landlords will tell you, good luck with that.
    Changing the locks will be the best $150 you spend. He will have to spend money on a lawyer then and that won’t be worth the hassle for this charmer, I’m willing to bet.

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    • Yes. Change the locks and don’t let him in. He will have to fight it in court if he wants back in. Also, remember that you must be separated for a year for a divorce. Allowing him back in the home can cause issues in regards to that.

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  3. I won’t give you legal advice but I work in the legal field! I wouldn’t let him move back in without talking to a lawyer first! Most family law firms will give you a consultation over the phone!

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  4. Sue Dubya Sue Dubya says:

    Consulting with ‘armchair lawyers’ on Facebook is probably not a great solution. Like Jennifer Inkster offered, most family law firms will give you a consultation for free, over the phone. As well, I believe (and I could be wrong), your first consultation may also be free if you make an appointment. Best to call and check. At least you’ll get proper advice.
    Good luck.

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    • Maja Black Maja Black says:

      It is up to her who she wants to ask. Many people ask here to get info from people who have been through it…no need to be a Facebook armchair critic

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    • Sue Dubya Sue Dubya says:

      Maja Black, not trying to be. Simply giving him/her best advice possible. Every circumstance is different and asking online can often lead to bad advice, regardless of whether they have been through it or not. I’ve been through a divorce and would never dare to offer advice to anyone on family law.

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    • Sue Dubya Sue Dubya says:

      Maja Black, but thanks for your wisdom.

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    • Maja Black Maja Black says:

      That is you, this is up to her

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    • Sue Dubya Sue Dubya says:

      Maja Black nobody said it wasn’t up to him/her. They are looking for advice. I gave them advice, based on my experience.

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    • Sue shut it! This is a forum for anyone to ask anything. You lady are irrelevant!!!! Take hike. No really. Get lost.

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    • And Sabrina, anyone can provide advice. Sue’s advice is good advice. You aren’t going to get proper legal advice from randoms on “Shout-out Edmonton”.

      So you shut it. The only irrelevant thing here is you.

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    • Sue Dubya Sue Dubya says:

      Sabrina Nicole holy hell, what is wrong with you? Didn’t get laid last night? I was being polite and didn’t ask for your crass, childish, nickel’s worth of delightful crap, little girl. So, go take a long walk off of a short pier.

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    • Maja Black Maja Black says:

      You judged the op for wanting public opinion, then slammed everyone who tried to teach you what this page is. Try and stay classy, it is none of your business if she got laid

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    • Man, you are dense, Maja Black. She didn’t judge anyone in her original post. You and Sabrina are just over-sensitive, whiny losers.

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    • No shit captain obvious, maybe she needs compassion you asshat.

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    • No, Sabrina, she needs advice… that’s what Sue gave, you bloviating moron.

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    • Sue Dubya Sue Dubya says:

      Maja Black how in the hell did you go from my offering advice to my judging anyone. What planet are you from? It’s obvious neither you, nor Sabrina can read or interpret common sense. Please go crawl back under your respective rocks and refrain from commenting on my post.
      In simple English, that you might understand: go crawl under the rock you each came from, and don’t say anything on my posts anymore, ok?

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    • Maja Black Maja Black says:

      You are judging the op for asking for advice…it is her business if she wants to ask on here.

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    • Sue Dubya Sue Dubya says:

      I think you’ve completely misinterpreted what I offered. You and Sabrina have both come aboard me for offering what others have said. That would be the two of you judging me.
      I haven’t seen anything posted from either you or Sabrina offering the OP any advice.
      And, at the end of my post, I offered him/her good luck. I’m pretty sure that’s not judging anyone.

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    • Maja Black, you keep using that word but I don’t think you know what it means.

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  5. Check if your employer offers legal services…. should be somewhere in your benefits package.

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  6. If he’s moved out it’s legally called abandonment. He has no grounds to move back in.

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    • My thought, too. I bet he got legal advice and it is in HIS best future financial interest to move back in. That way you have no right to have him put out. AND I believe a lawyer can help advise you on division of property where he hasn’t contributed to the residence.

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  7. tell his adddicted ass to get to rehab

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  8. Shaun Reveis Shaun Reveis says:

    Pretty sure the condo is technically half his.

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  9. It’s his property too not just yours. Chances are you needed his income to qualify for the condo so you probably won’t qualify to refinance the property into your own name unless you have a co-signer. Have him move in and put the condo up for sale cause either way he’s entitled to either 50% of the property or 50% of the proceeds of the sale. The only reason I would change the locks is if he was abusive and was a threat to your safety. The more amicable you two are, the less money your divorce will cost you in the long run.

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  10. Dont not let him move back in. Getting to.work his his problem not yours. Chanhe not like today and tell him he is not allowed bak. Big mistake if you let him back in

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  11. Please call a lawyer for a free consultation so you get sound legal advice

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  12. Tina Adam Tina Adam says:

    Been gone more than 3 months. That’s sounding like legal separation. Time to start the process. Tell him no and change the locks. He abandoned the property.UNLESS there’s more to this story and you’ve been actively trying to work it out.

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  13. My friend tried the same thing but she was told it’s his too and it’s illegal to refuse him access into his own house especially if u both share the mortgage. Consult a lawyer

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  14. Shaun Reveis Shaun Reveis says:

    I found this from a family law firm in Ontario. While alberta does have different laws, it’s likely the same on lock changing.

    http://familyllb.com/learn/changing-the-locks-in-ontario-the-law-on-separated-spouses-possession-the-matrimonial-home/

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  15. Anyone remember the movie ….”War of the roses “

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  16. Pretty sure you can change the locks

    Call the cops to ask or call the law society in Edmonton
    Pretty sure they offer free legal advice

    Once he’s back it will be hard to kick him out again

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  17. Tom Kinakin Tom Kinakin says:

    As long as he is on the lease he has you. You have to get him off. I cosigned a mortgage for a similar conniving bastard. Somehow in the shuffle I wound up on title. As it was explained to me, I’d never own the house as long as he was on lease, just the bill for it. I would have to resolve the mortgage and sue him afterwards. Bad situation to be in.

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  18. The only way you can legally keep him out is to obtain an exclusive possession order from the court. When my husband was going through his divorce with his ex-wife, she came in and ransacked the house, even though they’d been separated and she’d been out for more than two years at that point. The court said that because he didn’t have an exclusive possession order, she was allowed to come and go as she pleased.

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  19. I was told that because I left the house, I technically abandoned it so I lost my rights to come back. This was told to me by a legal mediator and the police.

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  20. Jodi Flatt Jodi Flatt says:

    If you have EAP through work, most have free consultations and offer you some legal advice.

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  21. Marie Krista Marie Krista says:

    He sure can move in if he’s on the mortgage! Just watched someone go threw this!

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  22. No you don’t have to let him back in. He will have to take you to court though, and likely you will have to sell the home because it doesn’t sound like either of you have the money to buy the other out…

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  23. Marion Clark Marion Clark says:

    My common law ex changed the locks on a house we owned togeather after I had left for a few days to let things settle. I phoned the police, he was not allowed to lock me out of a house as I owned half of it and my name was on title. I remortgaged and paid him out to get his name off the title, which was fair to both of us.

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  24. Kerri LG Kerri LG says:

    Go to the family law centre at the court house. They can advise you and will help you file your own paper work

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  25. Trish Down Trish Down says:

    Remember, if you plan on getting divorced, you must be separated for one full calendar year before you can proceed.

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  26. Karen G says:

    So your husband is back on the market? Damn, that’s good to know.

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  27. Jenn Brouwer Jenn Brouwer says:

    If his name is on the house you have to allow him to move in. If you lock him out all he has to do is call the police and tell them and they will make you allow him in. If his name is on the title he has rights to the house same as you. If I was you I would not do any of his washing. Keep your food etc locked up. Don’t give him the wifi password and those little things. That’s the best you can do to try to get him to not stick around.

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    • Dave Winters Dave Winters says:

      No she does not have to let him back in. He left the matrimonial home, even though his name is also on the mortgage. If they do divorce the home will be sold and the proceeds will be divided equally she can then go after the monies that he did not contribute towards the mortgage. Change the locks and contact a lawyer. Yes I’m speaking from experience.

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    • This could havevast negative impacts on her.
      While legally she has to, no one will enforce it so she should do everything she can (change the locks) to keep him out.

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  28. sounds like he is a moron, and a jackass, change the locks like right know, and tell him he can not stay with you.

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  29. M Lissa Sch M Lissa Sch says:

    Tell him no, he may not, in terms to the separation, and for him to stay where he is. And if he persists, you can request someone else stay with you that he really does not like. But changing the locks is a no-no unless he’s a threat.

    Probably best to consult with a lawyer, to see about exclusive possession of the property – your rights, etc. Consulting is free.. And you’ll have to share more information about the mortgage, your financial situation, etc. It’ll take time but you won’t get in trouble.

    However – if he does drugs, illegal things, or threatens you – that’s another story – you can bar him and request he stay away from the household and inform the police.

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  30. Yeah… you should call a family lawyer before letting him back in.

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  31. Call and talk to a lawyer for a consult almost all have free first call but on a personal note if you are not planning the have him back in your life why put yourself through that

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  32. Sue Kidd Sue Kidd says:

    Phone dial a lawyer. You get a free consultation! Don’t let him back in the home. No you don’t have to let him in. His lawyer probable told him to get back into the house!

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  33. 1. If you’re married, he’s not your “ex”
    2. I am pretty sure that he showed these exemplary qualities when you married him. Whatever happened to “For better and for worse”?
    3. Half the house is his. What makes you think you get to dictate what happens?

    Taking a hard nose legal approach will leave absolutely everyone broke in lawyer’s fees.

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  34. your situation is not unique. rather than listening to all non legal trolls, why don’t you go and sit in the family law chambers for a few days in a row.
    you will get a good idea of the law

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  35. Before letting him in call a lawyer. But just so you know eventually you will have to pay him out if both your names are on the mortgage or sell it. There are lawyers who do a consultation for free. And I agree with others change the locks.

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